With getting women or much else in life. I’ve counseled and coached with many males who have come to me with their number one goal being “getting women” and nearly every time these guys have had a shit ton of internal work that they needed to do but were putting off. They had been duped by the PUAs into believing that with magical phrases or thoughts beautiful women would leap into their bed without them having to put in the work and address their internal issues. According to the PUAs (snake oil salesmen who prey on insecure males) you don’t need to work out, dress nice, be confident, or do any actual work on yourself.
Just buy their overpriced program say these magical words and poof even the biggest nerd in the world will be pulling Playboy bunnies left and right. And if you doubt us here’s some infield of us hiring a model to talk with us or making out with a drunk girl but failing to seal the deal. And so on and so forth. So many males that have issues with their base masculinity as well as psychological and social issues fall for these snake oil salesmen and wonder why they have so much trouble with not just “getting girls” but also with life in general.
Women Are A Byproduct
Here’s the thing, there is nothing in this world worthwhile that you’ll get from not putting in the work, and I mean nothing. And “getting girls” is no exception. For the most part women are a byproduct of developing yourself. Meaning that the more you work on and develop yourself the more women you’ll naturally attract into your life. Don’t get me wrong you’ll still often have to make the first move as you’re the man, but instead of approaching 1000 women to have 1 have a lukewarm interest in you, you’ll instead attract women into your life to choose from. If you’re focused on “getting women” above all else it means you have a lot of internal work that needs to be done and aren’t going to be attracting very many women.
And this isn’t a bad thing as we all have to start somewhere. But a lot of guys with issues such as being out of shape, socially awkward, lack all masculinity, have mental problems, dress like slobs, and so on and so forth are being told to just go out there and say these magical lines and women will like them without them having to actually do anything. Not understanding that it’s not the lines that matter but the man saying them and the way he says them. Then these guys get stuck in an endless cycle where they never improve and end up more depressed and in a worse spot than they were before. Not realizing if they focused on their mission and themselves (meaning their development) they would attract more women then they know what to do with.
Snake Oil
People have been sold snake oil long before the days of the Wild West. Insecure people with real issues have been offered quick fix solutions that don’t have all that pesky hard work or dedication. Thing is, they never work. You can’t skip the hard work, ever. No one ever has and no one ever will. This isn’t to say you can’t work smart but you have to work hard in addition to working smart to get anything worthwhile. Plus with new laws (which only benefit attractive guys like me who have their shit together) the whole insecure beta creepily spam approach women stuff could land them in jail now.
Trust me no women is ever going to mind an attractive guy approaching her in an attractive way. The quicker these snake oil salesmen die out the better off all males will be, especially the insecure and confused ones that they prey upon. Also as a note there’s nothing wrong with being insecure or confused as our society has produced tons of males who are like this. But the solution is not to focus on “getting girls” which is never going to work for such a guy but rather to focus on becoming an attractive man. Essentially build it and they will come.
What Guys Who’s Number One Goal Is “Getting Girls” Should Do
I’m going to lay out a plan for guys who’s number one goal is “getting girls” should do instead.
- Start lifting weights, eating right, and getting enough sleep.
- Read one non-fiction book every two weeks.
- Start training a martial art.
- Find a group of quality men to keep you accountable and will hold you to a high standard.
- Stop watching porn, masturbating, and smoking weed.
- Journal every day to write out your thoughts and get a feel for them and where you need to improve.
Some books that I’d recommend starting with are The Manual by W. Anton, The Book of Pook by Pook, Models by Mark Manson (he’s weird but this book is decent and a much healthier and more accurate model of attraction than the PUA crap), The Way Of Men by Jack Donovan, as well as my own books to get you started. These books will help clear up the confusions caused by society and PUAs. Become a high value man and put in the work to become one and all these other problems solve themselves for the most part.
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge