So truth be told I sort of loathe the term “picking up” simply because of it’s connotations and unfortunate associations but I think that it still best describes the general idea of what I’m getting at here. I think analogies are great for getting points across and describing things that would be needlessly complex otherwise. Hence the tennis analogy with “picking up” girls. An area that a lot of guys seem to struggle with for a whole host of different reasons that I don’t have time to describe or go into detail about here.
But some of the main ones are focusing on “game” (the common definition such as lines and tactics) instead of being a high value guy, having “getting laid” as their number one priority and desire (which pretty much assures it’ll be way harder than it has to be), and again about a million other things that I don’t have time to discuss here. But let’s talk about the tennis analogy and how it’ll help you get what you want with dating and sexual relations with the opposite sex.
Variables
The first thing that I always recommend for guys when they’re looking to attract more women is to stop focusing on women and instead focus on themselves first and foremost and developing themselves. Nothing is going to do more for you than being a high value man. I’m not sure why so many try to get around this, well actually I take that back, I am sure it’s because that actually requires work and guys just want the “3 words that’ll get Victoria Secret models to sleep with you even if you’re a fat balding midget” or whatever. They want something that doesn’t exist.
But anyways first and foremost you need to focus on your development. Confidence, fitness, how you dress, and how you carry yourself are a great place to start. If that’s not down or at the very least being worked on than nothing else is going to help you. So as a bare bones basics try to dress nice and get in shape. And make sure to smile and make eye contact like a man instead of a creepy boy. The more you get this down the better off everything else is going to be, and I mean everything. Look if you want to date a top quality girl or attract plenty of good looking girls to sleep with you’re going to have to put in the work. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
How It’s Like Tennis
Alright with that out of the way let’s talk about tennis. So while I’m not a fan of cold approaching in the classic PUA spam approach everyone like a spastic weasel kind of way there is nothing wrong with approaching girls that you don’t know if you do it in the right way. Meaning one you’re a guy that girls actually you know want to fuck and second that you’re qualifying your “targets” (or whatever) in some way, shape, or form.
So for example one time me and my buddy were driving through his neighborhood when we saw some cute girls walking by. I told him to stop so we could talk to them. Now obviously I’m taking a “risk” here as this could be taken one of two ways. Either one “there is some weird creepy guys stopping to talk to us” (which I was confident wouldn’t happen because we’re confident and in shape, yes that’s generally all it takes) or two “Hey some hot guys are stopping to talk to us”. The reaction was the latter and eventually led to some fun.
But anyways how this is like tennis. Essentially with girls as the man you have to make the first move. You have to hit the ball over the net and then gauge the response. Some girls are going to hit the ball back with gusto while others are going to watch it bounce pass and look at you like “Why did you do that?”. You as the man have two jobs (if you want to be successful) the first is to actually hit the ball and the second is to be the kind of guy a girl actually wants to play with.
Keep It Simple
That’s really it. It’s hard to say which is more important because even if you’re a high value guy if you never ever pull the trigger you’re not going to get much results. However you could also be the ferret pulling the trigger with every girl and not get any results (except maybe a restraining order or jail time). So you have to do both, it’s not an either/or thing. Sort of like asking if you should breathe in or just breathe out. If you want to continue existing I’d suggest doing both. Likewise if you want success with women I’d suggest both building your value and hitting that ball over the net.
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge
