Now the title may seem a bit bold and I’ll admit there are some caveats here. For example if you aren’t working on the following things then no matter what you do you’re not going to have as many dates as you want. So before we go any further let’s get into some bases to have covered.
First off you’re working out right? I mean no one can expect to be really out of shape and have plenty of dates right? Sure some that are rich, famous, or hit certain other factors can do it. But if you’re trying to live your life as an exception to the rule then you have a very bumpy road ahead of you. You don’t have to be a model or superman or anything of that matter. But you are taking some time to be physically fit I’m assuming.
Next. You have basic social skills right? You know to smile and make eye contact, you know how to make a joke and keep a conversation going? Again you don’t have to be a comedian or the world’s greatest networker, but you do know like the bare bones basics, right? You can have social anxiety, most people do to an extent, again don’t have to be perfect. Just don’t be the guy huddled in the corner wondering why girls aren’t talking to him. Have the bare bones basics social skills.
Next. You don’t hate women right? First off it doesn’t make any sense to hate an entire gender. Firstly because you haven’t even met one one thousandths of the gender and two, it doesn’t make sense. Biologically speaking we were made for each other. Created man and woman, for a reason. We compliment each other and that is more than just physically. Hating women in general doesn’t make sense. And again is something that’ll ruin getting dates. If you harbor hatred do what you must to cleanse yourself of it.
Another thing. You dress somewhat decently right? Again, there are guys that dress like bums that get girls but again the whole living life by being the exception rule. Dress somewhat stylishly, not over the top. Just some jeans and a nicely fit shirt with some nice shoes are all you need to do. Nothing fancy. Just dress in clothes that fit you and reflect your style. Don’t have to be loaded down with chains and jewelry or wear feather boas. Just don’t look like a kid who’s mommy dressed them.
One final thing. How are your hormones? Because here’s the thing, no hormones, no dates. Matter of fact this right here I’d say is the most important thing. If your hormones aren’t right then you’re not going to have the true desire that women can sense and respond too. Get your hormones balanced out. Eat plenty of eat and cholesterol. Get good sleep. Workout. Get sunlight. Abstain from porn and masturbation. All that good stuff.
But know with all of that out of the way let’s get to getting all the dates that you want.
Is It Just A Numbers Game?
So one easy way to answer the above question “how to get all the dates you could possibly want” would be to just keep asking every girl out that you see. While that could possibly work it’s nowhere near an efficient or effective use of your time, not to mention all the other negative things that’d be associated with it. But I mean I guess technically it’d work and there is a bit of a numbers game to this whole thing. But let me explain.
Not every girl you ask out will want to go out with you. I don’t think this is a revelation to anyone, at least I hope not. Doesn’t matter who you are. Famous, rich, ridiculously good looking, whatever. Some girls are going to want to go out with you and some girls are not. That’s the fact of life. Now the more you hit certain traits the more girls that will want to go out with you. So in general the more rich, handsome, famous, whatever you are the more girls in general will want to go out with you.
But then there are other factors. For example a beautiful girl with a loser guy because the girl has low self-esteem or the guy reminds her of her father or who knows what else. There are other factors that you’re not going to be able to really control for, nor should you. Human interaction always has the element of chaos to it, after all. Maybe you remind them of a old dream or fantasy…or nightmare. Maybe things just synced up in a certain way. Again, there’s lots of factors that you won’t be able to control for and shouldn’t worry about.
Hence some girls will like you, some will not. The more handsome, rich, famous, etc. you are the more that will and then there are myriad other factors that are beyond our control or care that will affect which girls will like us and which will not. Literally billions of factors that you’ll go mad trying to cover for them all. You can’t and you shouldn’t cover for them. Just focus on you and do you.
But that brings us to another thing.
It Takes Two To Tango
Most advice when it comes to getting more dates or whatever you want to call it, acts like the woman doesn’t exist. Let me explain they act like the woman is just essentially a stand in mannequin that’ll respond the same way and is the same through and through. But that doesn’t match reality at all. The fact of the matter is when it comes to whether a girl will date a guy or not, it has more to do with the girl then the guy.
Let me elaborate. Most ‘pickup’ advice, for lack of a better term, acts like it’s 100% the guy and 0% the girl. The girl is just a floating object and if the guy does everything right he’ll get the girl every time, but that leaves out half the equation. As a matter of fact I’d say it’s 70% the girl and 30% the guy. Meaning if a girl didn’t like you it was very unlikely that it was because you did something wrong, though there are exceptions, but because of how she felt or at least how she felt towards you and not because of things you did.
Meaning stop obsessing over what you did wrong or right and realize more of this is out of your hands then most guys would probably be comfortable with. One girl could throw a drink in your face one night and let you take her home with you the next night and make love to her over and over. Even though you didn’t do anything different and are the exact same guy. That’s just the way this works. Girls that will be attracted to you or not are in constant fluctuation.
Hormonal cycles, moods, feelings, what happened recently, there are so many factors at play that the guy really plays much less of a role then we think. We see a guy with a good looking girl and we think “Oh, he must be doing things right” and hey, maybe he is. But also maybe just right place, right time. I’m not saying that the factors we talked about above don’t matter, because they do. Just that they don’t cover things 100% like we tend to think.
It’s not about you.
Or at least not in the way you think. You just be happy, live your life, take care of yourself, and the girls will self-select. Sure you’ll have to go out and approach them normally but don’t take it personally if you get rejected or get bent out of shape. Just do you thing and the women will come. Smile at the girls you find attractive and say “hi”, do that enough and will normal social skills that should lead to plenty of dating opportunities.
It’s Way Simpler Than You Think
People often complicate things when they want to make money off them. They throw all these terms and esoteric things at you so you feel lost and then say “Hey, I have the answer here…all for 3 low payments of 99.99”. We’ve all seen and heard it before. The dating/mating advice is no different. The guy really has to do a lot less than you think. And there are far more important things to focus on.
Getting money.
Leaving a legacy.
Developing yourself.
And are just a few. Hopefully this help clears up some things and takes some burdens off of your shoulders. This is one case where “If you build it” they will come in a way. Unlike say, starting a business. But that’s a whole other topic.
Regardless.
Thanks for reading.
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge
