So something that I don’t think I ever explained very well was exactly what I mean when I say to be “direct” with women. So first off semantics can be a bitch while I try to stay aware of certain things I also often take things in my own direction and place my own meaning on them which can be slightly (or very) different from what another person means by them. And I think the whole direct/indirect thing is a prime example. My direct may very well be someone else’s indirect in a way. But it’s goes further and deeper than that.
So let me get into what exactly what I mean when I say be direct with women and also what I don’t mean because as I’ve said this seems to have caused quite a bit of confusion. Before we go any further a couple things I want to lay out for first off. The basis of “game” is looking good, that matters more than anything else (unless you mind picking off scags just to get laid like many PUAs) but if you want quality looks are the number one factor. Second if you have severe social issues then picking up girls is honestly that last thing you should be focusing on. Alright with that said let’s continue.
What Does It Mean To Be Direct?
First off let’s cover what it doesn’t mean to be direct. It doesn’t mean going up to a girl and saying “Want to fuck?” or something like that. Don’t be retarded. Are there some girls at some points in time at some places that could work on? Especially if you’re good looking? Sure, but again not the best way to go about things for the average guy in the average situation. Being direct really has very little to do with the words that you say but rather the intention that you convey. So many guys focus on the words when the words are really meaningless. Look at it this way.
There is no set of words that’s going to take a girl who’s thinking “OMG that creepy guy is looing at me” to “OMG put a baby in me!”. Words are not what you need to be focusing on. What you need to focus on is conveying and honest intent so that you can tell if the girl is responsive to that intent or not. You’re being direct with your intent. Intent can be conveyed through body language, eye contact (number one), and overall “vibe”. Again attraction is a primal thing that happens on a primal level. It’s not rocket science. So for example flirting can be direct even though you’re not saying “I want to fuck you senseless” you’re still directly conveying the intention that you see her sexually and vice versa.
Friend Vs. Man
Here’s what I think of when I think of “indirect game” and why I’m against it. It’s hiding your intentions from a woman pretending to be a neutered friend with the hopes that you can then surprise her later with your sexuality and get laid. It’s going into the friend zone with hopes of getting laid. It’s being the gay best friend and then being surprised when she’s freaked out you desire her and wanted sex the whole time. It’s creepy, weird, and unmasculine and obviously chicks are rightfully going to be turned off by it and weirded out by it. It’s almost like a chick you’re making out with suddenly flopping a dick out of her pants.
I see many scrawny weird PUA types advocate this and then wonder why they have to approach 100 girls before one is desperate enough to touch his peepee. From the first time you interact with a woman you should be interacting with her as a man (meaning with your sexuality intact) she should know whats up. You should then be able to read if she is interested or not and escalate in accordance with. Screening for interest really is the basis of all of this and something many overlook. Interact with her as a man not as a as a neutered desexualized gay best friend who “just wants to chat”.
Attraction First Then Comfort
Another thing about being direct is that attraction has to be there before worrying about building comfort. Many PUAs because they are literally inferior seed try comfort first because attraction isn’t there (again why they have to approach 100 girls until one likes them). Don’t be their friend and then try to score, don’t be safe and then hot. That’s flipping things around and working against yourself. Attraction comes first and then comfort comes second. Ditch the weird average PUA nonsense and approach women as a man and you’ll have far more success than you ever thought possible. This is what I mean by be direct.
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-Charles Sledge
