Something I’ve run across many a time being in this whole “how to be more attractive to women business” is males who think that if they don’t have a rotating harem of different playboys models then they’re failing somehow in this part of their life. Which is ridiculous for many reasons but we’ll get to them in time. Essentially there are many guys who are trying to run the 100 meter dash in the Olympics before they can crawl.
For example I’ll have guys tell me that they’re virgins, never had a girlfriend, and (in their words) “hopelessly” addicted to porn and masturbation and they talk about establishing a harem and how to have a different girl in their bedroom every night. And my thought process with all of this has always been “Why?” as in why do you feel that you need such things?
What do you think that’s going to do for you? That’s not going to fulfill your sexual needs any more than having a girlfriend will as a matter of fact it’ll fulfill your sexual needs even less (will get to that in a moment) and more likely than not is a sort of “proving something to oneself” matter than it has to do with anything else, including actual sexual needs. That and its what their ideology has told them in the “true” and/or “proper” way.
How To Actually Prove Oneself
Banging random girls is not going to prove anything to yourself about who you are and about your masculinity. First off it’s not that hard (at least when you’re doing other things right) and second it’s just not something that’s going to bring you much fulfillment or confidence in yourself. Bedding random bar girls might seem like an “accomplishment” but after you start doing it you soon find out that it is anything but.
And the ROI is so low as to be ridiculous not to mention if you do this at nightclubs the potential damage to your health from lack of sleep alone. Or at the very least the amount of time that is spent in this pursuit with how little there is to show for it. To prove oneself as a man and get the confidence that comes with that (that will ironically attract more women to you then the “methods” talked about above) one needs to accomplish worthy goals.
It might be signing up for a gym membership and actually going. Starting one’s business or that novel. Breaking free of an addiction. Working to build one’s mental, spiritual, and physical health. And so on and so forth, these are worthy accomplishments and will build the confidence and gut level type of stuff that one needs to attract women in the first place.
The Girlfriend Solution
Now maybe this isn’t being done as a way to prove oneself but for actual sexual gratification and for sexual desires in which case I would say it’s even more ridiculous and here’s why. First understand that (aside from professionals which is a whole other discussion in and of itself) the best sex that you’re going to have is with a woman that knows you and is attracted to you. Meaning sex with a girlfriend (or wife in a healthy marriage) is always going to be better than some random girl at a bar/party/met while out.
Sure there can be something to be said for variety but beyond that not much. And instead of trying to always have to seduce a new girl you just have one that you can keep going back to in order to have your needs met while you focus on more important things in life (like those actual accomplishments we talked about above). For most guys simply getting a girlfriend is going to make so much more sense.
The harem thing is an overblown idea, sure I guess there’s something to be said for “accomplishing it” but when you do you soon find that the ROI really isn’t that high and that it really doesn’t make much sense unless one is really rich, have ridiculous amounts of time to spare, or has something to prove (and unfortunately accomplishing this will prove nothing to oneself or others). So for most guys I’d just say get a girlfriend.
Crazy Ideologies
The red pill can be just as dangerous as any other ideology out there. There is plenty of complete and utter nonsense to it that doesn’t correlate at all with reality. Of course that’s not to say become a feminist a mainstream conservative or anything like that, simply to understand that there’s plenty of nonsense out there. Especially when the marketers come to the ideologies town.
More often then not a girlfriend is going to serve you infinitely better than chasing girl after girl and having drunk (frankly often shitty) sex with them to fulfill an ego need that’ll never be fulfilled in this way. Same with having a harem or whatever “uber alpha extreme” buzzword comes out. Get a girlfriend and work on developing yourself. Then later if a harem is truly what you want then go for it, just don’t expect it to fulfill you or have a very high ROI.
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge
