Number one is she’s a woman and living in the modern age, just kidding (but not really). I know a lot of guys are looking for something more than just getting laid which is great. Maybe they want children, maybe it’s too uphold religious tenets, or maybe it’s because banging floozy after floozy just doesn’t fulfill them. Whatever the reason men need to understand that modern long term dating is a minefield. And while it’s never been a “better” time for easy sex (for the most part) it’s unfortunately not a very good time for long term relationships (though people drastically overestimate how easy it was before, there’s never been a time when nerdy losers were flush with women).
My point with all of this is that no matter what you’re doing you have to go into things with eyes wide open. I’ve seen a lot of lists floating around recently about red flags to look out for in women and decided I’d make a compilation of sorts whole adding in my own. This list is not comprehensive and not something to obsess over. Just a general guideline. And the number one thing that I can point out is that for the most part like attracts like. Healthy people attract healthy people. And if you still have major work to do on yourself I’d recommend not starting a long term relationship (unless it’s just a friends with benefits type deal). But with that being said let’s get to the red flags.
50 Red Flags Men Should Look Out For When Choosing A Woman For A Long Term Relationship
- High notch count (duh). Number one thing.
- Dyes hair weird color, has “stripper” nails, smokes (anything), dresses provocatively.
- Has ever cut self or done self-harm of any type.
- Worked as stripper/camwhore/Instagram “model”/anything of this nature.
- Has a lot of guy friends.
- Doesn’t want you hanging out with friends.
- Tatted. More tats the worse.
- Treats people badly. For example service workers is one obvious one.
- Every ex-boyfriend was abusive/asshole/jerk.
- Single mommy.
- Has slutty friends (bird of a feather).
- Is bisexual (why would you think she’d make a good wife?).
- Can’t cook or clean.
- Is out of shape.
- Is in too good of shape (you know what I mean).
- Says she a feminist after 25.
- Is older than you.
- Addicted to social media (okay yeah just described every Western woman).
- Uses her sexuality to get attention and/or make you jealous.
- No girlfriends (ties in with lots of guy friends).
- Too materialistic (wants a huge wedding big red flag).
- Doesn’t have a relationship with father.
- If she was every raped (even if she just claims it) or sexually abused run away. Sucks for her, but she needs professional help. You’ll just be destroyed in the process.
- Doesn’t want to serve you. Not saying she has to be a slave but should want to please you.
- Still in contact with her exes.
- Doesn’t want children/a family.
- Loves to cause drama (okay every girl loves drama but to a greater extent than normal).
- Identifies with other damaged women (aka has idolized Marilyn Monroe/Cardi B/whoever).
- Flakes all the time.
- Identifies as a “princess” (as wants to be spoiled and catered to).
- Too prideful to say she’s sorry or in the wrong, ever.
- Takes pills for a mental illness of any kind.
- Heavy into drugs and alcohol (if her personality is “smoking weed” that’s an issue).
- Has severe financial issues.
- Overly prudish (different from being chaste) means she’s hiding something.
- She lies (okay all women lie but like constantly and even about shit that doesn’t matter).
- Flirts with guys around you (obviously if you catch her flirting not around you also an issue).
- Has no interest in bettering herself.
- Tries to “wear the pants” and be dominant (if you’re a weak guy however this is your own fault).
- Friends and family hate her (huge one) or vice versa she isn’t close with her family (if it’s because family is damaged well again birds of a feather. Not her fault and there are exceptions but I wouldn’t bet your future on it).
- Constantly accuses you of things (like cheating), means she’s projecting.
- Extremely insecure and needy (again all women are this to one extent, but I’m talking above normal).
- You look deep into her eyes and something is “off”. Never go against you instincts they’ve kept our species alive for millions of years, they are there for a reason.
- Cool with abortion, doesn’t see anything wrong with it.
- Girl who acts loud or manly or a girl who tries to be “one of the boys”.
- She’s traveled to many different places and identifies with travel.
- Bad dynamic between father and mother. For example say she has a “good” relationship (in her eyes) with her father. Who treats her like a princess and/or is walked all over by her mother.
- Manipulative to get her way (again all women but to a greater extent than normal) will lie to get you to do something she wants to do then shrug it off like she didn’t really do it.
- You haven’t read my book How To Choose A Good Wife (C’mon there’s 50 give me at least one crass commercial plug) but seriously this book will lay it out for you plain and simple.
- You’re a loser/insecure/not where you want to be in life (above all else like attracts like).
So I know I’ve just described the majority of women out there which is why my best recommendation is to be smart, don’t rush into anything, and focus first and foremost on developing yourself as a man (from all angles) because the best way to attract a quality woman is to be a quality man yourself (vice versa for women). Like attracts like. Rich guys with nothing going for them end up with gold diggers because they’re similar. Nice guys end up with manipulative whores because they’re both the same (nice guys manipulate with niceness to get laid even though it doesn’t work). And so on and so forth.
What To Look For In A Woman For A Long Term Relationship
As an aside I think it’s far easier to simply look for a few key things instead of trying to avoid a bunch of things. So there are a few key things that you should look for instead of keeping a giant list in your head of what not to look for (though should still be familiar with the list). The first and foremost is notch count. A virgin is going to make the best wife period. Yes, I know every non-virgin woman reading this will shriek about how this is evil/awful/etc. but it’s the truth. This is probably the number one thing because it covers a whole lot of others. There are always exceptions to every rule but this gives you your best bet.
Next is relationship with her father. Is there a healthy relationship there? Relationship with family as a whole is important but the one with her father is critical. And then of course does she respect and defer to you? If she doesn’t respect you a good long term relationship just isn’t going to be possible plain and simple. Again I cover all of this and more in my book How To Choose A Good Wife which can save you heaps of trouble in not only finding a wife but a good long term relationship prospect and it is all around good knowledge to have. And remember like attracts like for the most part and nothing is 100%. Also if you want some other advice on this topic here are some resources.
- Christian McQueen’s “Exclusive Guide To Damaged Women”
- Dark Triad Man’s “10 Ways To Calculate Her Wife Value”
- Kyle Trouble’s “How To Tell If A Girl Is Worth A Deeper Investment”
- Chris Johnson’s “Red Flags To Watch Out For In Women”
- Revolutionary Lifestyle Design’s “How To Avoid Toxic Women”
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge
