It’s rare that I’ve answered mainstream type questions in my writings but I figured might as well for both the SEO as well as bringing more into the fold of actual advice that will get men what they want in life as compared to the watered down misleading crap that makes up most dating advice out there today. Especially when geared toward men. One popular question is “How do I get a girlfriend”. As a matter of fact the “How do I get a girlfriend” question is one of the most frequently asked question when it comes to dating and relationships for men. While this has implications in and of itself (one being my books need wider dissemination haha). A good helpful answer to this question is required, first off we have to address what attracts women to men and what makes for a man who can date the women he wants.
First off let’s start with debunking many common myths out there. Sorry but if a woman says that you’re “boyfriend material” guess who you’ll never be dating, that’s right any girl who says you’re “boyfriend material”. Let me translate that from woman language to men’s “You’re really boring and lame enough for me to sucker into marriage after I’ve had my fill of real men and can’t do any better”. Sort of like saying that you’re a nice guy, it’s not a compliment it means you lack masculinity and attractiveness. It’s the equivalent of when a woman says you should go on a date with her friend who has a “nice personality”. Nice personality in reality speak means way too many carbs and a bitchy attitude. So let’s dig deeper into why you may have trouble getting a girlfriend and how to answer the question of “How do I get a girlfriend?”.
Why You’re Having Trouble Getting A Girlfriend
Alright so this is a multifaceted topic that must be addressed from multipe angles for you to really understand what’s going on here. Sure this question could be answered with a simple “You’re not asking enough girls” but that’s a answer that isn’t going to help you much. You must understand the root cause of why you’re having trouble getting a girlfriend and then attack that. Otherwise you’ll just keep ending up in the situation that you are in now. Without a girlfriend and clueless as to why. Alright so truth be told regardless of what you want from women whether it’s a one night stand, casual dating, or a lifetime of monogamy there are certain traits required for attracting women in the first place.
Traits that you are probably not exhibiting or have not built up yet otherwise you wouldn’t have this problem. These traits vary from things like confidence to how high your testosterone is (seriously) but they all contribute to what we call masculinity. Essentially the more masculine a man is the more attractive to women that he will be. Now understand that what your definition of masculinity is in your head may be different from what I’m talking about here. So understand that a deficit of these attractive mascuine traits could very well be what’s holding you back from getting a girlfriend and leaving you blank to answering “How do I get a girlfriend?”. Increasing these traits will attract more women to you which is going to give you much better results then simply asking all you can until one says yes.
The #1 Reason You Can’t Get A Girlfriend
However with all that being said there is still something deeper that many males are suffering from that prevents them from ever getting a girlfriend. And that is they need a girlfriend. Now I know that sounds like a catch 22 (and it is) but it is not without answer. You see if you spend you’re time chasing after a girl it shows that you don’t have much value and the very fact that you feel you need a girl in your life for it to be complete or for you to be happy is going to repel women away from you like crazy. I know it sucks, but it’s the truth. In order to get lots of girls and/or girlfriends one must not need lots of girls and/or girlfriends.
So what the solution to this? What’s the answer to “How do I get a girlfriend?” and the short answer is “Don’t need one”. Alright easier said than done but I hope you get the general idea here. Perhaps you already knew this too and want more. Don’t worry I’ll deliver. The first thing you need to do is cultivate an abundance mindset. For example would you worry if you couldn’t get to a penny or lost a penny that you had? Of course not! And why not? Because it’s just a penny, they’re everywhere and plentiful. Well you need to realize two things. One no matter who you are on this earth there are more women who would date you then you could date in a lifetime even if you’re plain, second women are plentiful. It might sound harsh but truth be told all women are replaceable and no matter what there’s always another women who would be better out there.
So “How Do I Get A Girlfriend?”
Here’s how focus on yourself and your own development. Stop chasing women and start attracting them to you. Look at it like this. Say you’re the owner of a run down grungy biker club in a ghetto downtown area no matter how hard you market and chase after customers the kind you want aren’t going to come there. Now let’s say you work on moving uptown, attracting a different demographic, and change the bar then suddenly you’re going to start attracting the type of customers you want. Celebrities, pretty women, and thirsty dudes ready to pay exorbant cover and drink prices to get a chance with the beautiful women.
If you’re that run down bar with the biweekly shooting it’s time to change to get what you want. Focus on yourself and investing in yourself, stop putting so much focus on the girl(s). Realize that by developing yourself you’re going to attract women naturally. If you need a guide on how to do this I have plenty of free resources all around the site as well as a “quick start program” called The Primer. It’s a 21 day bootcamp of sorts to get you straightened out and on the path to success and lots of girlfriends. So the answer to the question “How do I get a girlfriend” is to start focusing on improving yourself and the women will come.
If you have any questions you would like to see answered in a future post send them to me at charlessledge001 (at) gmail (dot) com. If you found value in this post then I would encourage you to share this site with someone who may need it as well as check out my books here. I appreciate it.
-Charles Sledge
