This is a weekly column by Stefan Simonovic. Stefan runs multiple dating sites and writes about dating for men. In this article Stefan is going to talk about the secrets of tantric sex. An ancient practice that can help you get the most of your sex life and extend your pleasure. Something I’m sure every man is inerested in. Enjoy.
Being more mature in years means you’ve probably had a lot more sex, than the 20-somethings running around, trying to get laid via social media applications like Tinder. While they chase their digital booty, many senior singles already have quite of few quality notches in their bed posts, and don’t feel the need to get promiscuous online. Being sexually active in eras where sexual diseases were not threats, and when sexual revolutions blossomed means that a lot of mature singles have some amazing and unforgettable sexual experiences locked up, somewhere at the back of their memories and psyches.
In that time span, surely many have heard the word ‘Tantra’ and its relation to sex. Tantric sex was introduced to Westerns society by many Indian yogis who extolled the virtues of deepening the connection one shares with their partner through the magic of touch. Since its introduction, many have discovered how to channel all their sexual energy that would exit their bodies during orgasm, and how to cycle it back into your body. Tantric sex can be a source of endless energy and ecstatic pleasure!
So how to get in on this practice in your later years in life? Well, the good thing you are probably comfortable with your body and self, and know who you are. And it’s much easier to grasp that achieving the big “O” is not the only objective of a sexual interaction, and Tantra teaches just that. That a caress on the back of the neck can be just as stimulating as touching a clitoris.
Tantra teaches how to prolong the act, and how to increase your potent sexual energy, through becoming deeply connected and psychically intimate with your partner. The focus is no longer on the grand finale, since you don’t want to miss out on the incredible range of feeling and emotion that tantric sex involves. Indian yogis knew that sexual energy is one of the most powerful sources and means for creating well-being and health, and that’s why the whole focus of tantric sex is not based on the sexual organs themselves, but everything else. The whole body is a sexual organ which needs an intimate connection with another. It’s the best way to lessen stress hormones, and increase serotonin to provide pleasure from head to toe.
So, don’t worry about mastering strange-sounding positions like ‘lotus’ and ‘jumping spider’ and or endeavor to last a marathon 24-hour of lovemaking, just master the principles behind tantra which is the practice of deeply connecting you with your partner on all levels, not just the body.
Here are 4 steps for Tantric beginners:
1. Create an Intimate Space
Set up a place in your home that makes you feel comfortable, where you can relax and be playful. Make sure it’s clutter-free with soft lighting. If you can decorate with flowers, candles and soft and romantic fabrics. Smell is vitally important to our senses and increasing sensuality, so try natural oils like rose, jasmine, or ylang-ylang. Make a space where you can lie down, whether it’s a bed or a mattress on the ground, make it as comfortable as possible. Soft sheets and pillows are a good idea. And nothing is better than a sensual soundtrack of music that inspires you, play it lightly in the background to set the ambiance and mood.
2. Conjoin Breathe
Learning how to conjoin your breath and breathe together is how you will be able to in tune with your partner’s body. Harmonizing your breath is sexy and calming. One way is doing the yab-yom position which is when you straddle your partner and inhale while they exhale, and you keep doing that in unison. By doing this you become one cycle of breath, and you energize it, you’ll soon find yourself taking their breath into and down throughout your entire body and you’ll be connected to them. Consciously, as you exhale try to put energy into that breath and give them life. This is the most basic way you can share all of yourself with your partner. Breathing is most central component to all yogic practices and is the foundation of tantra.
3. Eyes Wide Open
Keeping your eyes closed keeps you internal and in your fantasy, the point is to make love with your eyes open which will give you the most connection and intimacy with your partner because you are present and witnesses the connection. It’s not easy to do, since insecurities and shyness or embarrassment of your own pleasure can pop up, so as it happens your partner can show you love and accept you, making intimacy much easier. It will reshape your perception of your Self and your partner since, it’s not easy to be seen, especially by the people we adore, but witnessing the act of love between you two will be transformative.
4. Go Slow
As many senior singles already know, great sex means that foreplay is essential, and for tantric sex it’s even more important. The tantric pace needs to be leisurely and slow, which allows for a nice build up, which actually helps men of all ages control their erection and maintain it long enough to match the woman’s arousal. The more time you spend in this process of building up energy, the longer the sexual pleasure will last and the more energy you create between yourselves. This is when seasoned seniors know that this time is supposed to be to totally focus on one another and connect.
If you have any questions you would like to see answered in a future post send them to me at charlessledge001 (at) gmail (dot) com. If you found value in this post then I would encourage you to share this site with someone who may need it as well as check out my books here. I appreciate it.
-Charles Sledge
