Recently I had a nightmare that stuck with me. I was in my childhood home yet the age I am now. It was 3 o’clock in the morning and I had just got done watching a fight or something. I went into the kitchen and was putting things away when I realized that the regular door was open and the screen door closed, something I never did. I went over to it and saw that there were three holes in the screen door near the top. I didn’t think much about it. Only that I needed to get it repaired, probably had some bugs in the house, and how strange it was because I never did that.
I shut the door and locked it, also though it was weird because even the screen door wasn’t locked and I’m usually near obsessive about locking things (life experience tells me this is wise). So anyways I went to a hallway that led to the stairs going up and noticed the light was on. Something flipped in my mind and I knew something was wrong. Then I saw my cousin at the bottom of the stairs. He was cowered over, crying, and had a look of sheer unadulterated terror. He pointed up the stairs and was mumbling something.
Then I heard my brother cry out in fear up the stairs. My brother is a few years younger than me but this cry sounded like he was still a boy when we lived in that house. That scream ignited something at the core of my being and soul. Sounds always seemed more primal than images to me, more visceral, who knows why. Anyways I charged up the stairs hellbent on eliminating any trace of whatever I was going to meet up them. Then I woke up drenched in sweat. I had to get up and check around the house before laying in bed for a few hours before falling back asleep.
Love, Strength, & Man
I’ll be the first to admit that I’m no Mr. Tough Guy. I try to avoid a fight whenever possible as fights are something that can go bad very fast. Though I believe man should be familiar with and tutored in violence I think the chances to use it outside a training context should be few and far between. I try to avoid conflict and places where I might be put in conflict. I’m not a coward but I’d never go looking for a fight either. Even when put in situations I look for the non-violent way out.
Granted this was a dream but there was something very different in it then in the few confrontations I’ve been in. With ones in real life I always tried avoidance and if not possible diffusion. I wanted to get out of there without a fight, without hurting the antagonist, and without getting hurt myself in the process. But in the dream the feelings (which to me are just as real as feelings anywhere else) were ENTIRELY different. Don’t get me wrong I was scared, I was scared out of my mind, probably literally. But when my brother screamed it awoke something very deep and primal in me.
Something I’ve had hints of in different times in my life (thinking my brother was getting picked on was one of them). But in full force. I went up those stairs ready to completely eliminate from existence whatever was up them. To use all of my strength and power to annihilate something on this earth. Like I said a very primal and deep thing. Deeper than emotion, certainly deeper than thinking, something that I’ve never truly felt in the waking world and hope never too.
What This Has To Do With Power & Strength
I’m guessing this has something to do with love and that which you love being put in mortal danger. It’s one thing when it’s yourself that’s in danger but something else when it’s someone you care about and who is not very strong themselves. There’s an extra added element to it. For example if you’re a father reading this and someone threatened you, you’d be mad, maybe a bit fearful, but there’d be a certain range of emotions. Emotions that would be completely different say if someone threatneed your children, especially if they’re young.
And I don’t mean overprotective psycho parent protect but I mean a true primal threat to them. You’d react very differently. Which brings me to the relationship between love and strength. If you love something you want to protect it, if you truly love something you’ll lay down your life for it. It’s a extremely deep and primal thing. But if you are weak then what can you do? Can a weak male truly love? Sure, I guess they can but that’s something to think about. Men need to build strength and power not just for themselves but for those they love.
Man acquired wisdom and strength for himself not just so he can be great but so he can protect and fight for those he loves. This world is an evil and awful place filled with all sorts of vermin and disgusting beings, beings without souls. It’s a dangerous place and when you have things which you love in this world well…I don’t have to tell you how that could turn out badly. Granted you can’t protect those you love from everything and shouldn’t but when it really comes down to it do you have the strength to protect them? To at least offer a fight in their defense?
Be Strong, Be Loving
Love is one of those words that the modern world has corrupted to have essentially no meaning. But love is a deep and primal word and has great power to it. Love of your blood, love of your tribe, love of your family. Men have split the skulls of others and died for these things. Love, wasn’t some airy-fairy meaningless abstract concept for them. It was a deep and primal action. A visceral response that welled from the deep recesses of their soul. A might powerful thing that sounds like thunder and burns like lightning.
If you love, and I hope you do, then you need strength to protect those that you love. Strength, power, wisdom, all of these things aren’t for yourself (though that’s part of it) they’re also for those around you. For the things and people that you truly care about. You’re not just doing it for yourself you’re doing it for them as well. Now you might say “Charles, this was just a dream.” and I understand. Maybe I’m making too much of this but still I think there are things here to consider for each and every man. Acquire power and strength not just for yourself for those and that which you love. You’ll need it.