In the process of learning, of growing, and becoming more we’re all going to hit plateaus. We’re all going to hit points where it feels like no matter what we do, no matter how hard we work, or what we try, that we end up stuck in the same place over and over again. There are various graphs that attempt to outline learning and most of them show progress in a line sloping upwards then a flatline where we hit a plateau then a small dip then the upward sloping line again. With the higher point of the graph representing more skill.
Essentially we work at becoming better at something, we get a little better. So we continue to work hard at something but don’t see much improvement, then we see a slight regression where we a little bit worse, and then that’s followed by another surge of growth. However all of this is part of the learning and growing process. Without the grind of the flat line the upward surge would never be there. You have to put in the work to get the reward.
But you already know that, what about times when you’re stuck in life and you’re not entirely sure why? When you feel like you might be heading in a somewhat right direction but what exactly you should do is foggy. Or maybe you’ve tried again and again to do more, to be more, to change habits and accomplish more but it’s just not happening, and you have no idea why this is.
Truth be told there is no one answer and it’ll require thinking hard, sorting through things, testing some things out, and most challenging of all taking a long, hard, and honest look at yourself and where you’re at.
Trouble Shooting Getting Stuck In Life
There are a million ways that a man can get stuck in this life and to those million problems a million solutions. Because of that I can’t just sit here and list do A or do B and it’ll all workout. We’re going to have to take a deeper dive than that. So let’s look at how to figure out where your problem is and what to do about it. Now if you’re stuck there could be a number of broad reasons. We’ll divide them into two large categories that’ll help us delve deeper, while also understanding that getting stuck is usually a combination of both categories.
Those categories are external and internal blocks. For example no having a job that allows you to afford the life that you want is an external block. Likewise sabotaging yourself whenever your on the cusp of success is an internal block. Yet they both correlate to one another. So first off state where you’re stuck. Write it out if it helps.
Write out what your problem is “No matter what I do I can’t seem to stop drinking.” or “I keep ending up in the same unhealthy relationships and don’t know how to get out.” or “I know living with my parents is killing my development and independence but the job I have feels safe and there’s hope of promotion in the future.” or one of the million other things.
Identify the problem. Then ask yourself if you think it’s primary an external issue, primarily an internal issue, or if it’s about a half and half split. I say primarily because no matter what there will likely be aspects of both internal and external blocks there. Now once you’ve identified that, ask yourself if you could take one action to change this what would it be? Write the question down, I’d suggest doing it before bed, and then writing the answer down first thing in the morning.
It might be nonsense or it might not. But do this night after night and let your subconscious work on the problem. This won’t get you answer in and of itself, but sometimes it does. But it’ll start getting your subconscious mind working on it while at the same time give you a general path that you can start taking action on.
Breaking It Down Further
But we need to do more than that. Next we need to break it down further. So we’ve identified if we need to focus on external blocks, internal, or a mix of both. And we’ve written the problem out as a question to our subconscious and we’re working daily to see what answers it is shooting up to us. Overtime a general path will solidify that should lead you in the general right direction. But then let’s look at what your conscious mind can do in the meantime. First off look at your problem, how knowledgeable are you on the subject.
For example let’s say its emotional issues that stem from a certain family upbringing. How much do you know about that subject? Have you ever read a book on it? Seen an interview? I’m not saying one book or interview or lecture or whatever is going to solve all your problems but its a step in the right direction and it gives your subconscious mind more to work with. Find information related to your particular block. Try to be as specific as possible. Is it social anxiety?
Look up reasons for social anxiety. Was it a traumatic event? Look up ways to help heal from traumatic events. Is it a brain thing? Look at neuroscience and how to rewire your brain. Is it a lack of social skills? Read How To Win Friends & Influence People a book everyone should read anyways. Is it lack of certain neurotransmitters from a crappy diet then look up healthy diets and foods that provide your brain, gut, and body what they need.
And so on and so forth.
You see the general direction that I’m heading. You should work to become an expert in whatever your block is and figure out the reasons for it. If it’s money trouble then learn sales and try to find a sales job near by, and so on and so forth. External blocks are usually easier to identify than external but that doesn’t mean they’re necessarily easier to solve. You’ll likely get past the block long before you become an expert in it.
Often it just takes a little nudging from questioning your subconscious and providing it with some information at the same time. But then some blocks will take longer.
Keep On, Keeping On
Is sometimes all that you can do and even when you throw everything at a block it just doesn’t seem to budge. The one thing that cannot do is give up. If you give up then the block wins, if you don’t give up then you’ll break through eventually. Sometimes we’re knocking down a garden wall variant of block and other times we’re knocking down the Great Wall of China. It takes time, effort, discipline, and consistency. Keep at it, keep on, keeping on. That’s all you can do sometimes.
But eventually, so long as you don’t give up, you’ll get through. Step by step, brick by brick, you’ll get there. I know that doesn’t mean much, but it is something to focus on and to remind yourself of in your own unique way. Go through this process I’ve outlined here and it’ll get you closer to your goal of getting unstuck. I know it’s not mind blowing in any way but that doesn’t mean it’s not effective and not worth a try.
Give it a go and see what it does for you.
