How do you know how you measure up? How do you know if you’re where you need to be? If you’re where you want to be? How do you know if you’re “living the song in your heart” and leaving a legacy that you’ll be proud of. Or how do you know that you’re not just wasting away the days growing old and losing the fire that is within you?
These are important questions and questions that are not always easy to answer but that are important. I’ve cautioned before about being careful about getting caught up in “mindless productivity” or being productive and/or busy for the sake of being productive and/or busy. What use it is that you check off every box every day, that you hit your cold shower every day, get to the gym, and all of that without a higher purpose to it all?
Don’t get me wrong those things are great and its your habits that make you but at the same time there’s more to it than just that. There’s more to it than just checking off that list (as important as that may be). But I’m getting a little bit off topic. It’s also about making sure that you’re headed in the right direction and making sure you’re becoming what you want to be and what you were created to be.
Here I’m going to go through some of the methods and ways to take stock of yourself and see how you are progressing. We often don’t have a very accurate view of ourselves in our minds, or at least of how we’ve changed and progress that we’ve made (or regression). After all we’re with ourselves all day every day so it’s going to be hard to notice the changes. But thankfully we have other methods.
Iron Sharpens Iron
The first that I would say is having a dedicated “tribe” or peer group or whatever you want to call it that is going to keep you accountable. These are people that are going to call you out on your excuses, your bullshit, but also give you good advice and speak the truth to you even when it hurts (especially when it hurts). Brothers that are going to keep you accountable and hold you to a high standard.
So not your co-workers, no your buddies that like to sit around and drink/smoke weed in the garage/basement while watching sports/playing video games or whatever. These are men that are going to hold you ass to the fire as you do the same to them. And these men are extremely rare and hard to find, much less organize a group around.
But it’s well worth the effort to find them and organize a group as best that you can. Even if you can’t find or organize a group even having one “accountability partner” or whatever you want to call it can work wonders in changing both your and his life. But you have to stick with it and you have to actually hold each other to a standard and call one another out on excuses and bullshit.
Competition
Step into the ring in front of hundreds of people and you very quickly discover a whole bunch about yourself. Competition is essential to a man’s soul and development. Whether it’s physical competitions, competition for mates, business competition, or the many many other kinds of competition out there. Competition is essential to see how you’re developing and test your mettle physically, mentally, and spiritually.
For example let’s use boxing. It’s one thing to have your coach and spar mates say you’re improving, doing good, or becoming better it’s another to go out and prove it in the ring against an opponent who wants to win just as bad as you do (not that winning is what it’s about, though that should be the goal). You can’t hide behind things when you’re out there fighting.
It all comes out. The good, the bad, and the ugly. And that’s a good thing. You may think you’re simply competing at a certain skill (whether that’s punching someone, writing a screenplay, or anything else) but you’re really doing a whole lot more than just that. Not to say all competitions are the same but there is something to be said for the act of competing and measuring one’s self against another in a respective field of endeavor.
Introspection
So truth be told most just can’t do this. Most people haven’t developed the character or honesty with themselves to do introspection well. They’ll think that they’re doing introspection but instead they’ll be just saying what they want to say to themselves and seeing what they want to see, making the whole thing useless. For introspection to work you have to be honest and sometimes even harsh with yourself, otherwise it’s not going to do anything.
There are many different ways to start this process off and get it going in the right direction. Hikes or walks through nature alone, journaling, meditation, and many more. The goal is to see within yourself and identify strengths, weaknesses, and direction (among other things) and then make the changes and adjustments that are needed. Again of the three this is by far the hardest and most likely to fail for the majority of people.
And that’s because we all B.S. ourselves and give ourselves excuses more often than not. That includes the mentally disciplined among us. So to make this work you have to do it right and you have to be honest with it. Don’t look at things as how you’d like them to be but rather look at them as they are and then make the adjustments needed so things will eventually be how you’d like them to be or at least as close as possible.
Taking Stock Of Yourself
Is not an easy task but something that is important for your development as a man. And something that you need to be aware of. Because if not you will drift into complacency and weakness which never leads to good things for a man. So make sure to find ways to hold yourself accountable and take stock of yourself and where you’re at and make the adjustments that are needed. Don’t fear the fire that makes you stronger and sharper.
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge
