How To Never Lose Your Edge & Live A Full Life

There are many perils in this world that no one is going to tell you about. Sure when you’re young you may be told to be wary of strangers, look both ways before you cross the street, and things of that nature but there are still a great many things out there that can destroy you just as thoroughly that are either ignored or even encouraged in some cases. What one person sees as harmless could in fact be deadly.

But what specifically am I talking about? Well there are too many things to list in any one place. You have to use your wisdom and judgement, however with that being said, there are certain things that I see pop up in men’s lives again and again and again. Things that range from hampering their development to completely destroying their lives, depending on the severity and the factors working against these negative things.

I call them the numbing agents. A numbing agent is something that dulls your body, mind, or spirit, or in many cases all three, and the modern world is stuffed full of them by design. Some of the common ones are porn, weed, social media, alcohol, tobacco, gambling, drugs, and a host of other things. Anything that gives you a dopamine boost without having anything good associated with it, for some people junk food would fit into this.

How To Fight Back Against The Numbing Agents

Whenever I talk about numbing agents with people the usual response that I get is “Oh well numbing agent X isn’t bad for me or bothering me.”, AKA denial. Now look I’m not saying you can never have a drink, or use social media, or anything of that matter. Though there are things like porn that I just don’t see having any place in a healthy man’s existence. What I’m saying is that when these things become a habit, become a big part of your life, or when you can’t stop them is when they become a problem.

A challenge that I tell many to do and would suggest you do to is look at your life and identify a numbing agent that you may have or something you suspect might be a numbing agent in your life. Now go without that thing for a month and see how you do. You’d be amazed how many guys who said porn or weed wasn’t a problem for them but failed time and time again to go a month without them. If you can’t go a month without something, that’s not healthy, then it’s a problem. This applies to all numbing agents.

However once you can identify you have a problem you can begin working on it. It might sound cliché, but the first step is admittance. Once you know you have a problem then you began working on it. And even if you pass the “test” you may find that your life is enriched without having the numbing agent in it. Especially if you replace it with something healthier and more fulfilling. But start with the test and then go from there.

Why Most People Fail When Trying To Quit A Numbing Agent

So say you’ve discovered that a numbing agent is a problem for you or say you just want it out of your life. What do you do? What most people do is try to quit cold turkey. They just use force of will to try and not do the thing. And while willpower is one of the most powerful forces on earth this isn’t the right use for it. Your brain has grooves that are going to be very hard to overcome at the start and you need to work these grooves out. There are general things you can do and specific.

The general things that you can do to help your brain recover and forge new healthier habits are do mindfulness meditation, eat healthy foods, spend time in nature, and exercise. These are basic things but they make a huge difference when it comes to getting negative habits out of your life, in many cases they are the difference maker. Meaning before adapting these habits, most can’t overcome the numbing agents, but after adapting them they find it much easier. Many feel like completely different people.

After general we have specific. These are specific actions that you can take to counter whatever the numbing agent that is giving you the most problems is. So you have to find the reason for the numbing agent, which will take some introspection. Keep asking yourself why. Ask “Why do I need numbing agent in my life?” answer that question and then ask why again. Keep asking yourself and you’ll get deeper and deeper into the meaning why you have adapted the numbing agent as a coping mechanism.

Once you find that out then work to correct the underlying factor. Let’s say you smoke weed because deep down you can’t deal with the stresses and problems of life. So what are actions that you can take and more importantly habits you can forge that’ll help you deal with the stresses and problems of life? Sure we have the general habits above but let’s go deeper. What does weed do for your brain and what is a healthy alternative to it? What destresses you brain? In this case something like meditation might move from being generally good to specifically good.

The problem most have is they take the numbing agent out without adding something in. The reason you have a numbing agent is because there’s a lack somewhere. So you have to fulfill that lack or the numbing agent will be fighting with you almost always. You can’t just stop bad habits you have to also forge good habits to replace the bad habits and give you what you needed in the first place. Replace the bad with the good, that’s how it works, can’t just take out bad and leave a gap there.

Calling A Spade, A Spade

One critical thing is that you have to have radical self-honesty. You have to look yourself in the mirror and size up your strengths and weaknesses and we all have them. If you smoke weed, watch porn, or whatever else and can’t stop or won’t stop that is a weakness plain and simple. Calling it anything else, denying it, minimizing it, does not change what it is, which is a weakness. And weaknesses need to be addressed.

Now let me make it clear that having a weakness does not mean that you are bad, inferior, or anything of that matter. We all have weaknesses and we need to be honest about places that we are weak so that we can address them and become who we were created to be. We have to be honest with ourselves and others and call a spade, a spade. Calling a spade a rake helps no one. We have to be honest with ourselves.

We have to address our weaknesses while at the same time realizing that having a weakness does not mean we’re a bad person. We have to get over the ego that’ll keep us trapped and stagnant. Be honest with yourself, especially when it hurts, especially when it sucks. That’s the only way to grow and to move forward. If you have a numbing agent in your life, it’s not helping you, and you should get it out. Plain and simple.

The Anti-Numbing Agent Lifestyle

Remember that numbing agents most often come about because of lack. By living your life in a certain way and adopting a certain lifestyle you can make yourself as anti-numbing agent as possible. Adopting a lifestyle that’ll keep you sharp and keep performing the best you can physically, mentally, and spiritually. So what does such a lifestyle constitute, what does it look like? Well like every lifestyle, it is defined and made up of habits. A lifestyle is simply the sum total of your habits, nothing less and nothing more.

And the warrior poet lifestyle is the best defense against the numbing agents and their effects. But what constitutes the warrior poet’s lifestyle? Many things, too many to discuss here but we’ll cover a few. Reading, writing, looking for new experiences, hunting, spending time in nature, meditating, exploring, learning new skills, challenging yourself, laughing, hand to hand combat with sparring, and so much more.

A lifestyle with those things is going to fulfill you, challenge you, and make you grow. Men thrive on challenge, they grow on challenge. Beware too much comfort, always seek to challenge yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually so that you may grow and become more. You need some challenge in your life. Life isn’t meant to be one hundred percent challenge or one hundred percent comfort. Just make sure that you have some sort of challenge in your life that is forcing you to grow and adopt good habits that are going to create a good lifestyle, which creates a good life.

We are defined by our actions not our thoughts, words, or dreams. Deeds not words. And it is daily actions that forge habits that forge a life. Want to be a warrior poet? Then do the daily actions of a warrior poet. Those daily actions will become habits and habits create who you are. And make sure that you get rid of the numbing agents they do you no good.

If you have any questions you would like to see answered in a future post send them to me at charlessledge001 (at) gmail (dot) com. If you found value in this post then I would encourage you to share this site with someone who may need it as well as check out my books here. I appreciate it.

-Charles Sledge