What does it mean to be a winner and why is it a good thing? First off understand that being a winner does not mean that you win at everything. Most winners have a long string of losses stretching out behind them yet that doesn’t make them any less a winner, we all have to take our licks at some place and sometime. Yet if losing doesn’t make one a loser and in fact most winners lose a lot then what on earth does it mean to be a winner or a loser? Sorry if that’s confusing, I’ll try to make it a little simpler.
When I’m talking about how to become a winner, I’m talking about how to become a winner at life. And that means to be doing well in all areas and always striving for more. It means having every area of your life covered and having the knowledge and drive to make the most out of it. But ironically these wins are built off of many losses, no different then it is in sports. For example look at someone at the top of their game whether it’s someone like Michael Jordan or Khabib Nurmagomedov. Both were seen as top of their game, unparalleled in their time.
While team sports are different then individual sports Michael himself seemed unbeatable, even if his team wasn’t. Likewise Khabib sports an undefeated MMA record (and will always if he stays retired). I think these men would be considered winners, at the very least in their respective sports. Yet both of these men had to lose countless times. Jordan didn’t make his highschool basketball team and Khabib was likely getting smashed by his father’s students at the age of 8. It’s no different with sport then it is with life.
The First Part To Becoming A Winner…Lose
It might seem strange or ironic but the first thing you need to do to become a winner is lose. And not lose because you never tried or because you gave up. But lose while giving it your all and the best that you got. This applies to all areas in life. Whether it’s starting your first business, writing your first book, asking that first girl on a date, or whatever. Chances are, most of these things aren’t going to go well for you or have a positive outcome, at least the first time. Not always, and the more groundwork you do beforehand (knowledge and getting your licks in) the better chance that you have but still the fact remains.
You have to go out there and you have to fail, again and again and again. It’s ironic because often it’s very hard to have an ego as a winner. Sure there are guys with money or successful athletes who are cocky and have huge egos but that’s generally because either they were blessed with natural talent, daddy’s money, or are covering for other insecurities and are winning at one facet of life but not life itself. The average winner does not have a big ego, he’s seen too much and lost too often to do so. You have to do the same thing, put your ego in check and get out there and lose.
You have to put your neck on the line and be ready to get it chopped off again and again and again. You’ll repeatedly find out that you’re not the best, the brightest, the quickest, the strongest, the this or the that. The start of becoming a winner is traumatizing to the ego. Which is why most males will never do it. They’re too invested in their ego, instead of reality, and couldn’t hack it. Maybe they’ll have moderate success in one area but never success across all areas of life or life as a whole. You have to be willing to sacrifice your ego day in and day out for wisdom, strength, and learning.
If Winners Lose, Why Aren’t They Losers?
Okay so I said that the first step to becoming a winner is losing, but that begs the questions why doesn’t that make one a loser? If both winners and losers lose, what makes the difference between them? What makes one something to be respected and venerated and the other something to be discouraged and looked down upon? After all they both lose right? Well yes and no. You see there is more then one way to be a loser. I’ll address two major ones and the strange thing is, there are losers who “lose” less then winners, depending on how you look at it. Let me explain.
The first loser is the guy who never tries. He never sticks his neck out and he never does anything. He stays in his little cocoon or bubble and never leaves his door. He’s afraid of the blows that his ego will take when he ventures out, because he knows deep down, even if he covers it with a convincing smokescreen, that he can’t hack it. Don’t get me wrong we’ve all been there, the problem comes when we stay there. In order to protect his ego he loses out on life and all the rich experiences that it has to offer. He’ll stay in his little “safe space” and never accomplish anything of worth.
The other loser is the guy who sets out but as soon as he encounters any resistance folds in, usually accompanies by lots of whining and complaining. If things don’t go exactly his way then he’s out. If society, government, and everything isn’t lined up exactly to give him the best benefit then he’s crying about it. There are guys like this on every side and every place. While there are more then just these two ways to be a loser, these two are two of the most common ways that I’ve seen. And two things that you want to avoid.
The #1 Trait That Determines If You’ll Be A Winner Or Not
Bloody minded determination. When someone can break your legs, give you a disease, spit on you, turn your family against you, and you see it as nothing more then bumps in the road and continue on. That’s the mindset of a winner. To just keep pushing no matter what’s coming back the other way. The winner is a hero, at least in the classical sense of being a hero. As in the man that won’t give up despite overwhelming odds and mountains of adversity. The man that keeps his head down and pushes on, again and again and again. The man that just won’t give up. Not that he’s dumb, he has a plan, he studies and is smart, but he also keeps pushing.
You can’t just work hard you have to work smart as well, but then on top of all of that you can’t give up either. You have to keep pushing forward, take the L’s and understand there’s going to be plenty more to come. But that’s how you progress that’s how you keep moving forward and keep learning. That’s how you become a winner. You do the hard things and don’t give up. This applies to every facet of life. Not just the one you’re thinking of right now. So get out there and lose, so that you may rise as a winner.
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge
