There are many ways and paths by which a man can define himself and who he is. Some good, some not so good, and most somewhere in between. Today I want to talk about how to define yourself as a man, what this means, why this is important, and how to go about it in what I think is the best way possible. First off let’s address what this means and why this matters.
First off what does it mean to define yourself? The dictionary definition of define is “1. a statement of the exact meaning of a word, especially in a dictionary” so what does this have to do with who you are as a man? Well to define yourself means to pick where you stand, what you stand for, and the kind of man that you are. What makes up the deepest parts of you and what you’re working to refine those parts into.
Why is this important? Well is you don’t define yourself and work to live out that definition then you will be defined by others, by the mainstream, and by the place in which you find yourself. In healthy cultures this isn’t such a bad thing as culture will dictate you don’t end up too far in the wrong direction but we live in one of the most unhealthy cultures to ever exist. And therefore this path is fraught with peril. You must define yourself or you’ll be defined by others.
If you don’t define yourself your life will be characterized by a lack that you can’t quite place or understand. A numbness that you not entirely sure how to get over. Like your caught in a current that you don’t want to be caught in yet don’t really understand how to get out of, perhaps you think its inevitable and there’s nothing you can do about it. Well there is.
And that thing is to define yourself.
Things That Do NOT Define A Man
But that the modern world tries to trick you in believing do. There are things that are said to “define” a man that really have very little to do with actually defining oneself. Many will pursue these false avenues with nothing but the same empty feeling to show for it. These modes of definition do benefit people such as governments, corporations, and power structures but what they do not do is define nor help you. And that’s our focus here.
So what are these false ways that are promoted to so many? That so many are misled by? That so many end going round and round in circles in? Let’s start with perhaps the most popular, especially in America. And that is consumerism or being defined by the things that ones buys. This spread across the board for pretty much all consumable things. Whether brands of clothing, cars, homes, or whatever else.
A person who buys brand A is a certain kind of person and someone who buys brand B is a different kind of person and so on and so forth. These brands use celebrities, actors, athletes, and others to promote this and people fall for it hook, line, and sinker. And when I say people I mean more than just children but adults as well. A brand does not define you, it says nothing about who or what you are.
But consumerist brands are the only thing. Political ideology is another. Political ideology is essentially meaningless in the modern world. Liberals, conservatives, libertarians, green party, and every other all are part of the same power structure, all believe the same modernist lies, all don’t offer any real solutions to anything, otherwise they’d cease to exist. If you define yourself by a political ideology you are defining yourself by lies that are designed to enrich those in power and further destroy those that are not.
A definition based on lies will feel rotten and won’t hold up over time. And political ideologies are nothing but different lies designed to keep people in chains from actually thinking or getting anything done. At least in the modern age. So now that we know things that don’t actually define who you are, let’s move on the the biggest thing that defines you.
The Single Greatest Factor That’ll Define Who You Are As A Man & As A Person
Talk is cheap, though even cheaper. Promises are broken each and every day in a million different ways. People say they’ll be there then they aren’t. People say they’re good when they’re not. We live in a world of lies, built by lies, ruled by lies, and for the proliferation and health of those lies. But there is something that cuts through it all. That breaks through and can be seen by all for better or for worse, and it is that single thing that’ll define you more than anything else in this world or this life.
And that thing is your actions. When the chips are on the table what do you do? Hell what do you do in the boring moments of each and every day? Those make up who you are more than anything else. Your daily habits which means your daily actions they define and delineate who you are as a man and person. More than any other single factor. If you want to be or become something then take the actions that are required.
Thinking about being this or that doesn’t mean or do anything it’s only by actually taking action that anything takes place in the real actualized world. Action takes things from the realms of possibility to the realm of reality. It calls something forth from another realm, that’s how powerful it is. And it’s the greatest single thing that’s going to define who and what you are and how this life of yours is going to be.
Other Secondary Things That’ll Define You As A Man
While the actions that you take are the single greatest thing that’s not to say that there aren’t others, other places and sources of power that a man can draw identify for. Especially when is just starting our forging one’s identity it’s hard to do without some sort of material to work with, to shape and to form. Let’s looks at them and discuss how to use them all while remembering that they all fall short of the actions that one takes.
The first thing is one’s profession. Now I don’t think one should be completely defined by their profession and I think you should have interests outside your profession to be a well rounded person and live a full life. But your profession does say something about you, or at least used too. It points to something. At the very least somewhat of a vision of how you see yourself. Think about the line of work you chose and if you’d rather be doing something else. And if you’d rather be doing that something else, ask yourself why.
You’ll get some clues to who you are and who you want to be. Make sure those two things are moving closer and closer to one another, even though they’ll never be completely together. Another thing is your tribe. What’s your ethnic heritage, not your nationality, dirt doesn’t define a person, blood does. Though there is something to be said for being a “mountain man” or a “sea farer” or something like that. But who were your ancestors? Your tribe? Your people? You have them, even if you forgotten them. Blood calls out honoring.
Not One Single Thing Will Define You
Rather it’ll be a combination of all of these factors and more. However your actions are the most important. We as humans are a combination of different facets and things, often contradictory in nature. But that’s the way it is. When looking to define yourself work every day to be closer to your ideal, whatever it may be. And when I say work I don’t mean talk about it or think thoughts about it, I mean take actions to accomplish it and as Pook would say “unite your dream and day” until they become one and the same.
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge
