There was an article I read a while ago about the decline of movies for men. I can’t remember if it was on a real literary site or something like Return of Kings but one of the messages that it talked about really stuck with me. It talked about how in an older movie, especially a coming of age one, a man might have to grapple with a problem like war or some great terror that is across the land. And through overcoming this he becomes much more of a man than he was before. But how that’s changing with modern movies.
The example they used was American Pie where a group of desperate highschoolers are all focused on losing their virginity and how much that it meant to them. Granted you can say this is a comedy but the general principle still holds true. Something like this would probably be seen as laughable to most societies in most times. They talked about how in American Pie the focus is on getting laid at all costs possible and the many things that a man will do because he is desperate for sex.
Again it was a comedy but you see this pop up more and more, mostly in comedies but it goes over into other genres as well. And sure it can be funny when you realize it’s ridiculous but the obsessed with sex and putting sex as a sort of god is something that our culture has done more and more. Ironically, or perhaps not, while the actual amount of sex is going down. Sex dominates many males lives, at least when they’re not getting it, and becomes their main focus of existence. Leading to all sorts of issues.
Wants Before Needs
The thing is most males have been taught that sex is a rare thing and that a woman wanting sex with them is the woman doing them a favor and rare as a unicorn. Maybe this seems ridiculous but you’d be amazed at some of the things you’ll see. They’re taught to do all sorts of ridiculous things to get in bed with some girl. They’re taught to genuflect before women and shower them with compliments. Support the right political causes and be “good boys”. They’re taught to “respect” (meaning worship) women and that will reward them with sex.
They’re taught to wear funny clothing and become dancing monkeys. They’re taught to buy high priced drinks in hopes to lower a woman’s inhibitions enough. They’re taught to memorize long scripts to impress random girls at bars. They’re taught that there is a scientific formula for getting laid complete with a six hour time frame and this and that. They’re taught all of this nonsense and more. Combine it with the pedestalization that sex has in our culture and you end up with an interesting mix.
Then when these methods fail many males become bitter and angry. Saying that all women are evil and out to get them. That the system is rigged (every system is rigged by the way) and this and that. They can go into depression, anger, and sometimes violence. No good places to be and all because of the swirling vortex of nonsense regarding this relatively simple topic. Why has something that’s so natural and easy become so hard?
Putting It In Its Proper Place
Ironically men who don’t focus on any of this nonsense or on getting sex are the one’s who usually have all they need from it. The men who focus on themselves and being men and would think having to “learn” to get laid one of the most ridiculous things that they’ve ever heard. Dorks call them “naturals”, but for thousands of years they’ve just been called men. Granted so many males listen to the culture around them and don’t have strong fathers around to teach them any better so are far off from ever becoming true men.
So they need to be taught that which came naturally. That which was supposed to be taught by the healthy culture, by the father, and by the men of the tribe. Three things that are lost in the modern world. You have males adrift being told to go in the wrong direction where they’ll eventually shipwreck and die. They taught to make a simple biological function their god which ironically will prevent them from getting that scratch itched when they want it to.
And so it dominates their lives and they can never focus on the things that truly matter. A male desperate to get laid cares little about honor, right living, and things like true morals. All he wants is sex and he wants it now, which usually means he won’t get it. Only those that realize sex is easy to obtain and not that big of deal generally have easy access to it and can focus on the important things in life. So many males are blinded and controlled by sex that they’re not having which as we looked at above doesn’t lead good places.
Sex As Control
Thereby sex is used as a controlling factor or I should say the desire and deification of sex is used as a controlling factor. A factor that prevents males from actually developing, from waking up and seeing what’s around them. It keeps them on a treadmill of deifying and worshiping sex and getting little if any of it. Sex is just sex, sure it’s nice but it’s not the end all be all of existence, not anywhere close. Once a man figures this out and figures out that sex is easy to attain if that’s what he wants he can focus on the things that actually matter.
Like himself and the culture around him. Once he finds that bedding different women isn’t that fulfilling he’s realize that there’s more important things to life and focus on those things. As opposed to the guy who never does this or thinks it’s impossible but really wants to who will end up on a hamster wheel going nowhere for the rest of his life. Somewhere none of us want to be.
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-Charles Sledge
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