The Defeatist Mindset

The Defeatist Mindset by Charles Sledge

I’ve talked a lot about the importance of mind, hell even wrote a book about it. And one thing that I’ve seen played out over and over again is that those with the right mindset will overcome any obstacles that stand between them and where they want to go and likewise those with the wrong mindset will not get where they want to go no matter what advantages are given to them. Mindset is the master, mindset is what matters most.

You see we are trained since we are young by society, media, and many others (sometimes even family) to have a defeatist mindset. What this means is that we are trained to be losers essentially. We are trained to think that things aren’t going to go our way and that there is nothing we can do about it. We are trained to be limp wristed and weak minded victims. To be pushed around by this world and to blame “fate”, “chance” or whatever other boogeyman we have been convinced in the source for all our problems. This mindset is toxic and no one who has a defeatist mindset will ever achieve the success that they want in life. It’s impossible.

The Defeatist Mindset

You can see the defeatist mindset all around you, it’s what the vast majority of the population has. They blame everything and everyone else for their failures and shortcomings and never take responsibility for their own lives. Oh and don’t think just because you’re not part of the mainstream that you are not immune. Let’s look at some other defeatist mindsets. There is the whole MGTOW all women are evil sluts and any problems I have with women is because they’re evil sluts and feminism.

Likewise the PUA mindset. All women are creatures holier and greater than I (even if I don’t say this out loud) and I must perform tricks to make my value as high as that of the angelic women who are all probably out of my league anyways. That’s why neither group of these men will ever be successful. If you can’t master something as simple and easy as women then there’s not much hope for you mastering life. With the wrong mindset (the defeatist mindset) you conclude that you’ll lose before you even begin.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

Life is for the most part a self-fulfilling prophecy. Meaning if you expect to win then often you’ll win and if you expect to lose then often you will lose. This doesn’t mean that hard work and skill don’t play a role because they most certainly do. You can have anything you want in life if you’re willing to put in the work to get it. Losers will never get what they want in life because they rather have the comfort of blaming other people and other things for their life not shaping up the way they want instead of taking responsibility for where they are at and then going out and getting what they want from life.

You could give someone with the defeatist mindset, the victim mindset every head start, advantage, and bonus there was to give in the world and it’d be squandered. Because the person with the defeatist mindset doesn’t want to win they want to be miserable and be validated for that misery. They want others to take pity on them and say “Aw you poor thing those evil mean racists/feminists/insert other excuse for failure and being a little bitch here hurt you didn’t they, you poor thing. You have every right to be mad/sad/bitter/pathetic”. How absolutely and utterly pathetic is that?

Stand Strong, & Have The Mindset Of A Winner

So you got hit in life, things didn’t go as you expected. Welcome to the real world bubba and guess what unless you start hardening up it’s only going to go downhill from here. Other losers may validate you defeatist mindset and you can all throw pity parties with each other while the real men are out fighting and creating the life that they want. Then when they actually achieve it you can just fall back on it was luck/not possible/fate or whatever else keeps you from facing the music everyday. Stand strong and have the mindset of a winner.

This world has no tolerance for the weak. Stop waiting on someone to mother you like if you were a newborn infant. So much of the defeatist mindset comes from that. Wanting people to take pity on you and coddle you. Fuck that, have some damn pride in yourself and rise up. If you’re not getting the results you want in life, it’s your own fault. Drop the defeatist mindset and take responsibility for where you are at. That way when the world hits you again (as it inevitably will) you’ll be strong enough to hit it back ten times as hard. But this starts with having the right mindset.


Stop rationalizing your failures, stop waiting on people to validate your suffering and baby you, stop having the defeatist mindset. It’s pathetic. Man up, find your balls, and march forward to meet the world like a winner, like a king, like a man. Happiness in life comes through strength. No one is going to have pity on you and a male looking for pity is the most pathetic thing I can think of. Drop the victim mindset, take responsibility, and set out after the life that you want.

If you have any questions you would like to see answered in a future post send them to me at charlessledge001 (at) gmail (dot) com. If you found value in this post then I would encourage you to share this site with someone who may need it as well as check out my books here. I appreciate it.

-Charles Sledge


Charles Sledge

  • Johnny Grube

    The great thing about growing up in the 80’s everyone
    pushed personal responsibility and you were held
    accountable for your fuck ups, you may of had excuses
    but no one wanted to hear it. I can never remember
    anyone who played the victim, ever poor parents
    would not allow their kids to use it as an excuse, fuck
    defeat, like I said at 17 had my first kid had my own
    apartment as a sophomore in high school, all I knew
    is hard work was the only way to make my life better!

    • Sounds like a much healthier society and mentality then what we have now. Where people try harder to be victims than at anything else, it’s pathetic.