This is a guest post from Placide Buduri. Placide who is a long time reader and 25 year old male who moved from the Republic of Congo to Texas for work. He is planning on starting his own blog here soon. In this article he talks about his experience working in a female dominated office (something more and more of us experience) and how he copes with it. You might find some tips to help cope as well if you find yourself in a female dominated workplace. Enjoy.
This article is about my experience in a female dominated office. I finished college at 23 and started working for a huge hotel company as a barista. The coffee environment was fun and easy but not as rewarding for a college graduate. I was faced with a challenge of keeping up with loans, rent, and basic needs for a $9.00/hour pay. It was almost impossible.
However the company I worked for encouraged everyone to switch careers and try other jobs they felt comfortable with within the company.
I consider myself a man of action. I moved from the coffee world to work as reservation agent . A reservation (similar to booking agent) agent is someone who books hotel stay for guest at a hotel, resort, or even air trips.
I was excited about getting paid about 4 dollars more. A switch in careers was an exciting move since being an agent requires sale skills. Let’s skip the interview process, I got the job; my excitement was over the roof. I was looking forward to not wearing aprons anymore and leaving work without smelling like coffee for a change.
Its not until I started training that I found out, I was the only heterosexual male in the office full of females, the other two guys were homosexuals.
To clarify I have nothing against gay men, those I’ve met are giving, caring, and fun to be around. However, they mostly behave like women. Both women and gay men consistently chit chat about nonsense, they get emotional too quickly, and try hard to be liked. I am sure everyone would have similar or different views or opinions on this depending on the experience.
That being said, I grew up in a society were masculinity is encouraged. Men and women both play their biological roles instilled in them without any questions. Lets face it, American society has gone to shit, people cut off their genitals and most people are okay with it. Female households have increased, and masculinity is quickly disappearing from the western culture or at least where I live.
I was saying how excited I was to start a new job and then I realized, I will be spending 8 hours a day in a female environment with no masculinity energy in the room? I panicked. I tried finding out about articles or books written about surviving in a female world as a modern man, and here we are. It’s 5am when I wrote this line when it suddenly hit me that I can actually write articles about a female oriented office, after working there for only 3 months.
The job itself is challenging. Working in a people business is difficult enough. It’s almost impossible to please everyone. Scratch that, “its impossible to please everyone”. You have customers who are happy with your service, and you have others who will threaten to give you a bad review if you don’t refund them for their stay, just because housekeeping took long to bring an extra towel or soap.
The others will give you 3 stars because the food did not taste as they expected. How the fuck do you measure food taste with ratings? “Ohh, my burger taste like 2 stars, while a different person might say: “it’s the best damn burger I’ve had in a long time. However, lets all agree, it’s about the service, if someone receive the best service where the waitress or waiter pay enough attention, smiles and have few banters with the guest, the meal does not become an issue, the customer is satisfied in that case. But when you forget to refill the water, it becomes a rating matter.
My point is, when you combine work challenges with female chit chat in the background, talking about nonsense, you ignore it at first. But when you have a customer on the phone, trying to book a stay, and you are trying your best to focus and close the sale and you have co-workers who would not shut up, and laughing uncontrollably, it’s raging. When you tell them to shut the fuck up for a second, they listen and then they go back to the same behavior after 5 minutes
Charles Sledge once wrote “Women are like children“.
One time I had a customer over the phone repeat his credit card number three times, because it was difficult to hear. Other times customers would personally ask me to make my co workers shut up.
Women & Work
I love women, I grew up with 3 sisters, I’ve had few girlfriends, I’ve had female classmates. Nothing about their behavior is new. The only issue is If I were to embrace my masculine nature in the office, I would have been fired after one week. But, women are so protected they get away with a lot shit that are unacceptable in a work environment.
You may ask, is there a positive side? Of course, I was trained by a women, my supervisor and my manager who hired me are women, and my success sometimes depend on how dedicated these women are to help me succeed. They are always present when someone needs assistance; some of them have the most creative and brilliant mind I have come across (millennial standard).
How do you survive? Do you blend in? Do you embrace your masculinity and risk it all? Do you stay true to whom you are?
There is no right or wrong answer, it depend on what makes someone happy. I take one day at a time
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