The Importance Of Father Son Bonding

The Importance Of Father Son Bonding by Charles Sledge

There are not many relationships more sacred then that between a father and his son. And no relationship will have a bigger impact on what kind of man a boy develops into than his relationship with his father. Of course this could also be said of daughters (but that’s an topic for another article). Society knows this which is why they do all that they can to separate and sever this bond. They know that if they can sever this bond then they will have complete control to do as they please.

Bonding between father and son is incredibly important and something that you should make time for. If you don’t raise him then the corrupt media, “education” system, religious system, and the random emotions of his mother will. A guaranteed way for a boy to have problems in life is to have someone other than his father or a strong masculine father figure be his main source of knowledge and behavior during his upbringing. Women for the many things they can do right cannot raise a child properly after the age of five. It is then that the father’s presence is the main presence and the one that determines a good portion of how the child will develop.

Strong Fathers Make Strong Sons

And likewise weak fathers make weak sons. Whenever I see a boy who is struggling with life. He has trouble with girls, with fitting in, is often picked on, he either becomes bitter and angry striking out and rebelling or he becomes even softer and gets used to being a doormat. Sometimes a weird combination of both. What I’ve noticed is that nearly every single last one of these boys either have an absent relationship with their father or one where their father is not giving them what they need. This comes from boys of all different backgrounds as well from those living in a trailer in the holler to those living in a mansion on top of a hill.

I’ve also heard these fathers when talking about their sons “I don’t get what’s wrong with him, I would have killed to have what he has at that age” generally referring to monetary wealth, a nice school with pretty girls, or something else that they didn’t have at that age. Not realizing that what their sons want and need desperately is to be taken and guided by their fathers in the ways of man. Nothing can replace that, nothing. These boys are listless, afraid, and feminine because they don’t have masculine guidance and are waiting to be initiated into the world of manhood. They need masculine influence and direction to get what they want. Those that are confident and happy are generally those with truly good relationships with strong fathers.

Crucial To Development

This relationship and guidance is crucial for a boy’s development. It’s crucial and sets up a great foundation when he is young and becomes even more important when he hits puberty. From the ages of 0-5 a child’s most important relationship is going to be with it’s mother as it should be. At this stage it still requires nurturing and things that a mother can do best. However once out of that stage then the most important relationship is going to be with the child’s father. Then the child is going to look to the father for it’s clues as to how it’s supposed to act and will follow the father’s example.

The best thing you can do for your son (or daughter) is set a good example of the man you want him to be. Preaching won’t do any good. You can’t tell your son to be strong but then give in to your wife it doesn’t work that way. The biggest impact is going to be through your example. Show your son how you want him to be, behave, and act don’t tell. Telling does nothing without an example. This doesn’t mean you can’t instruct him or tell him about things where you went wrong and hopes he’ll do better in. Make sure you’re teaching him not preaching to him. So first off be a great example and then be a great teacher.

Ways To Bond

Before our society offered many chances, opportunities, and ways for a father and son to bond. It was healthy and natural so society made sure to make room for this. However now with our corrupted society it does the opposite and tries to destroy this. But you can still make time if it’s a priority to you. In the agricultural age father and son would work the fields together and the son would learn much from his father this changed with the industrial age and is getting even worse now. However that is no excuse here are just some ways that you can use to bond with your son. The earlier you start the better off you’ll be and if you’re son doesn’t respect you he won’t want to bond with you. You must be strong.

These are going to be rapid fire I could expand on each one but then this would be more of a book instead of an article. Pick the ones that make logical sense to you and that best fit with you and your son and your lifestyle. Going to the gym, working on stuff (cars, house, etc. showing him how to fix things), hunting and fishing, riding (horses, quads, motorcycles), going shooting, camping (think there is something particularly strong about nature). Remember if your son respects you and see you as a strong leader and hero he’ll want to do these things with you. However if he doubts your strength and ability to teach him he’ll want to do other things.

Summary

Father son bonding is incredibly important to a son’s development, perhaps the most important thing. It’s something that you have to make time for and have as a priority. And something that must be done when they are young and through adolescence. Once they go out into the world they are going to no longer want your guidance and resent you if you try to offer it then after neglecting it for so long. Make sure to make time for this when it still counts and when it can still do the most amount of good.

If you have any questions you would like to see answered in a future post send them to me at charlessledge001 (at) gmail (dot) com. If you found value in this post then I would encourage you to share this site with someone who may need it as well as check out my books here. I appreciate it. You can follow me on Twitter here.

-Charles Sledge

Charles Sledge