One of the most foolish notions in the “advice on getting women” portion of the internet is the idea is that it’s a good use of your time or effective to “convert” women who aren’t that interested in you. One of the first articles I wrote for this site was called “Attract Don’t Pursue” and that was when I knew much less about the “getting women” side of the internet and figured most of them were on the up and up. In that article I recommend that men “instead of chasing women you become the kind of man that women chase.”
And that was at a time when I was more focused on having fun than making serious money. Now with everything going on in my life I could never imagine wasting my time on a woman who wasn’t very interested. Yet this is what many gurus recommend, spend your time trying to “convert” a woman who only has lukewarm interest in you and at best sees you as a placeholder until something better comes along or is using you to validate herself and get attention. Not exactly a good trade off. As a man there are much better ways to invest your time.
The Rules Of Attraction
As a guy sex is going to play a pretty big role in your life, nothing wrong with this. I love beautiful women just as much as the next guy. However I love using my time in the right way even more. Not only is it more efficient to work on yourself to become attractive to more women but in the #metoo every man is a potential rapist era it’s also much safer. When it comes to sleeping with women remember the two iron rules of attraction. The first one is be attractive and the second is don’t be unattractive.
Sure there’s more to it than that but that is the fundamental underpinning of it all. Yes what you say matters, how you act, your mentality, and all of that but underneath it all is if there is attraction or not and how much attraction is there? Meaning that if your attractive enough it doesn’t matter much what you say or what you wear or how much you earn but if you’re unattractive then those things matter much more so. But if you’re too unattractive then those things aren’t going to make a difference at all.
What Does That Have To Do With Anything?
What I’m getting at is that by working on yourself and becoming attractive you not only use your time in the best way, have options of sleeping with the most women, but also make everything much less effortless for yourself. You should never try to “convince” a woman to sleep with you (mostly because it can’t be done) sure there are low T 120 lb PUAs out there who will tell you that they’ve pestered women into sleeping with them before and they probably have. But is losing your self-respect, opening yourself up to #metoo allegations, and getting crappy sex from a woman who doen’t even want you really worth it?
I’d say hell no. Now you may ask “Well Charles right now I don’t really get any attention from women so I have to put in lots of work to get them interested in me” and if that’s the case then you want to put all that work into yourself instead of into chasing women, who probably don’t want you to chase them in the first place. Your time is too precious for that. Don’t waste your times with women who look at you and think “Meh, maybe if I get drunker and need some validation” you want women who look at you and think “Hell yes”.
Striking A Balance
Of course as man you’ll most likely have to make the first move and all of that. This doesn’t negate having “game” but rather understanding that game plays less of a role than sheer physical attraction. At least as far as getting laid is concerned. Put the work into yourself work out and put on some muscle mass, dress nicer, and do things to improve yourself. Read books, write books, learn an instrument, and much more. Not to attract women but to pursue greatness. You’ll find more and more women become “hell yes” and that you’ll wonder why you wasted so much time before.
Don’t go after women who aren’t that interested in you. It’s never worth it. Instead focus on yourself and develop yourself to the point where the women that you want are wanting you to. You’ll have always have girls who have the hots for you, girls who will never be interested you, and girls somewhere in the middle. Only focus on the ones that have the hots for you or leaning in that direction. Time is your most valuable asset don’t waste it.
If anything I said here interests you I’d highly recommend you check out The Ultimate Alpha Collection which is a compilation of 16 of my books for the price of 5. It covers everything from being a man to making money to getting the right mindset to getting girls to fighting and more and is a resource no man should be without. Pick up your copy today!
-Charles Sledge
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